Jonathan Right-Now

If you get a two topping pizza, extra cheese should count as one of those toppings.

The Food Manufacturing Guy is like “red skittles are 0% cherry. It’s 90% sugar and 10% red.” And everyone is like “WOW. new favorite account.”

Fundamentally dress codes are anti-black.

also ALSO saying things for school dress codes like “no aggressive long nails” is the same as clubs saying “no sportswear” in that it’s anti-black.

Trying to figure out how to sneak into A1 cash & carry so I can buy the exact same cold foam they use at Tim Hortons.

Why doesn’t his so-called curiosity ever extend to his own sexuality. Why isn’t it Bi-Curious George?

So close to deleting this app so I don’t need to read another god awful opinion on Obsession.

-Has a downright dogshit take -Turns off replies

Today’s controversial take is that Allan Peters designs are boring and trite.

My controversial nobody-asked boomer take is: there are wayyy too many “incredibly talentless but perfect for social media” artists out there and it keeps getting worse.

I’m going to win that s15

Seeing people smoking during Fashion Week is so embarrassing Jesus Christ.

Whenever I send an email with an attachment and then try to open the attachment myself and get hit with the “You should only open attachments from a trustworthy source.”

.@lorenbouchard hey I’ve got a burger of the day, please use it: A wuther one heights the crust Thank you.

WHISKY (RELEASE ME) into ROBBERY is incredible.

What’s your favourite song about bodies hitting the floor?

One cool thing about me is literally every time I’ve tried to DJ over the past few years something goes wrong. I have a 100% failure rate. Could be a sign.

Nvm

Did anyone do xxxtentacion/hulk hogan yet?