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JON SCHABL (@JSchabl) profile picture

JON SCHABL

@JSchabl

nothing to report

 Los Angeles / Toronto
jonschabl.com
Joined January 2011
  • Tweets15.3K
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  • Followers2.1K
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Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)Photo by JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)
27 years ago my dad called Mr Holland’s Opus “Mr Hobo’s Oboe” and since then I’ve thought about it at least twice a week.
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If you like unfair rule-changes mid-game then you’ll LOVE playing with my cheating kids.
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Does the name @JENGA mean nothing to you animals?!?
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Friendly reminder: loving The Nightmare Before Christmas is not the same as having a personality.
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Well, I just hit the tip of my peen with the shower squeegee so now I have to cut off the whole hog.
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I bought the pumpkin and now we’re in love.
JON SCHABL (@JSchabl) profile pictureJON SCHABL@JSchabl25 Oct 2023
Great. Now I’m hard at this pumpkin patch.
Image from JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)
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Great. Now I’m hard at this pumpkin patch.
Image from JON SCHABL (@JSchabl)
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The Da Vinci Chode.
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(To the tune of the Muppet Babies theme song) 🎶 I’VE GOT SCABIES 🎶
I, for one, am looking forward to our new supreme twitter leader Elon and the hoards of sexy crypto-bot followers that are to come.
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It must be such a bummer to cover your Humvee in a matte-camo wrap only to realize it won’t make your daddy love you.
It still blows my mind that Edamame is short for Edward’s Mommy Got It Goin’ On.
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This’ll show him.
The Guardian (@guardian) profile pictureThe Guardian
@guardian26 Oct 2022
Kanye West wax figure removed from public view at Madame Tussauds theguardian.com/music/2022/o…
Kanye West wax figure removed from public view at Madame Tussauds

Kanye West wax figure removed from public view at Madame Tussauds

London museum moves figure of US rapper to archive room following recent antisemitic and anti-black remarks

theguardian.com
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Might jump on this trend and throw roast beef at a statue.
Guardian Environment (@guardianeco) profile pictureGuardian Environment
@guardianeco23 Oct 2022
Climate activists throw mashed potatoes at Monet work in Germany theguardian.com/environment/…
Climate activists throw mashed potatoes at Monet work in Germany

Climate activists throw mashed potatoes at Monet work in Germany

Two protesters pelt painting with potatoes and glue their hands to wall at Museum Barberini in Potsdam

theguardian.com
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Maybe kick a rotisserie chicken into the Statue Of David’s peen.
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DeSantis both sounds like brand of urinal and looks like someone I would piss on.
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News headlines in the 90s: Man walks dog through neighborhood News headlines now: UFO vapes vaccine cloud at Proud Boys rally. You won’t believe what happens next
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I use the “Die Hard is a Christmas movie” argument to convince people The Devil Wears Prada is an Adrian Grenier movie.
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Me, the second my wife undoes a single button.
Fascinating (@fasc1nate) profile pictureFascinating
@fasc1nate19 Oct 2022
Baby elephants typically don't learn to control their trunks until they're about a year old, which may result in behavior like this.
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Why Are There Cheerios In The Toilet?: A Confused Father’s Tale.
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Part of the mystery/cereal genre.
My son got his tonsils take out and now his breath smells like hospice care for fish.
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Yeah I’ll go *camping. I love *camping. *smoking weed outside
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