Alethea Allen, MD, MTS

Maybe since our new bishop is an actual attorney our conference can stop paying so many insanely high and also somewhat mysterious legal fees. #VAUMC

He scoped out the entire #LEGO store and chose The Fab 5 Loft. Forget Star Wars, this ten year old is all about style. #queereye #fab5 @ Disney Springs instagram.com/p/Cjx4Je1AI41/…

For whoever needs to hear this today: Your brain’s lack of dopamine is not your fault. Procrastinating isn’t a moral failure. You aren’t lazy. You don’t need to try harder. #ADHD

I showed my 3 year old patient this photo of me on a swinging bridge above crocodiles and he said, “Good God, Almighty!! And you didn’t even die!” I love my job. That is all. #tweetiatrician

I was really proud of my teenage son for trying to learn coping skills for his ADHD….until he wrote a 500 word essay in MLA format with a works cited page, and CDC data asking for a “therapeutic listening device”……a.k.a. noise canceling AirPods. #ADHD

Saw a new 5 yr old patient with undiagnosed ADHD. After 30 min. of him bouncing around the room, his grandma telling him to sit still, and me saying, “He’s fine. Let him play..,” he whispered to his grandma, “She isn’t an angry doctor grandma. It’s ok. She’s not angry.” I cried.

I had a moment this weekend when I watched my 18 yr old daughter walk towards an interview with such poise and confidence that I couldn’t believe she was actually my child. That was a catch your breath, maybe grace is real kind of moment. Still in awe.

Hey. Crying babies will have red tympanic membranes. This does not mean they have an ear infection. Learning how to examine a baby without making them cry is an actual clinical skill and also why “infected” ears look perfectly normal in my office the next day. Thanks and bye.

How I feel when Omicron is suddenly everywhere and we’re still trying to explain Delta to patients. “I wasn’t ready! I wasn’t ready!”

This week I’ve diagnosed: COVID-19 RSV Flu A Flu B Human metapneumovirus Rhinovirus Parainfluenza virus Adenovirus All in infants under age 1. Sometimes three viruses in one child at a time. Love babies? Get vaccinated Wear a mask Don’t touch a baby if it isn’t yours.

Pediatrician problems: your adorable patients bring you holiday goodies only to realize when you get home that your family has eaten everything delicious and left you nothing. Nothing!

I’m sorry to be a holiday Grinch, but if you have a newborn baby, this is not the year to spend Christmas with your 25 cousins and their 75 unvaccinated children. Stay home. Protect your baby. Spread germs and Christmas cheer next year.

I am at the stage of pre-Christmas shopping where packages are arriving at my door that I completely forgot about ordering. #ADHD #WorkingMomProblems #COVIDExhausted

Unpopular take: I loved Organic Chemistry. Breaking the curve and humbling all the chauvinistic guys in my class was glorious. And yes, understanding organic chemistry matters in medicine. Just ask every baby with jaundice whose brain was saved from kernicterus by phototherapy.

Free CME: Shaming parents about their child’s BMI doesn’t make you a better doctor. Talking to kids about nutrition and being active in a simple, positive, and nonjudgmental way will make you a better doctor.

If you are looking for a simple way to shine some light in the darkness this holiday season, here you go....

When it’s time to hold your toddler so the pediatrician can look in their ears, hold them tight. No arms flailing. No heads twisting. No kicking the doctor in the chest. Dads, I’m talking to you. Seriously. You guys are the worst toddler holders.

I just came here to say that 6 year olds should not have homework. Unless by “homework” you mean telling them to go play outside. Otherwise, no.

It is a fact that @cb_johns makes the best pecan pie on the planet and if you don’t pronounce it “peee-can” then your opinion means nothing to me.