Here to make the rest of your life the best of your life.
Joined August 2010
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Best Worst Advice retweeted
Before you go to their place for date night, you have to know their Wi-Fi speeds. 🛜 Priorities, people! 😉
Best Worst Advice retweeted
The Mavericks can’t wait to trade Cooper Flagg to the Lakers. #nbadraft2025
RT @Schindizzle: The greatest upset in sports history is Deion Sanders’ son being passed up for a white kid from Utah with greater mobility.
Best Worst Advice retweeted
With all due respect to Mariah, Beverly D’Angelo will always be the true Queen of Christmas.
Best Worst Advice retweeted
With all due respect to Clark Griswold, what the fuck kind of holiday bonus was he expecting that would cover putting in a swimming pool and flying in all of his relatives to dedicate it?
Jake Paul: Imagine being such a shithead that everyone is rooting for the rapist cannibal to beat your ass.
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Best Worst Advice retweeted
Before the internet, people argued about things because they couldn't look them up, so it's nice to have the internet now so no one argues anymore.
Best Worst Advice retweeted
This seven-layer dip is actually eight-layer dip because I'm also eating my feelings.
Best Worst Advice retweeted
The most painful form of ghosting is when the server at a Mexican restaurant never refills your chips.
Best Worst Advice retweeted
It's dumb that there isn't a Netflix movie called "Insta Grams" where Adam Sandler and Martin Lawrence dress as old women to become social media influencers for some reason.