Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost) header
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I Write Undertale Fanfics And Shitposts. They/them. Beware the skeleton porn (including font, pap and sanscest). I pay taxes https://nitter.cf/t.co/bJfahRBWaD

Joined October 2018
Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)Photo by Captain Shitpost (@CaptainSh1tpost)
Captain Shitpost retweeted
Agnes Tachyon you are scaring me
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
Ao3 down but this fanfic shit easy af
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as a woman whose most commented-upon trait was my intelligence, can confirm that the majority of men who say they like intelligent women ACTUALLY mean "I like women who agree with me on everything."
Men may admire intelligent women in principle, yet respond differently when confronted with their intelligence in person. As I told @JosieCox_NYC, it is another way women are considered 'never quite right' at work. fastcompany.com/91630773/the…
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
Ma io noto che quando non mi depilo le ascelle, nonostante mi lavi e metta il deodorante, puzzo più facilmente rispetto a quando non li ho. Detto una cazzata o c’è qualcuno con me?
è incredibile che nel 2026 ancora troppe donne non capiscano che la depilazione è stata creata dal capitalismo e non ha NULLA a che vedere con igiene e pulizia.
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
The main reason people are told they don't need dysphoria to be trans is that dysphoria can look like depression when it has been your natural state of being your entire life
You need dysphoria to be trans. You need dysphoria to be trans. You need dysphoria to be trans. You need dysphoria to be trans. You need dysphoria to be trans.
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my fallen angel
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
serbian is just the kawaii version of bulgarian
other slav languages are so funny wdym "ne mogu" is i cant it sounds so cute lol
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a enfermeira no postinho pedindo pra me abraçar porque ela viu na minha carteirinha de vacinação que ela tinha me vacinado quando eu tinha 5 anos 😭😭😭
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It’s funny how many people don’t realize they have an accent
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
Told my male friend I have to go to a pelvic health massage therapist and he asked if all she does is finger me and call me tight and it’s like yeah with a little massage on the side too
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
Okay so it’s like trees can grow in nature but if you physically plant the tree it doesn’t make the tree fake
How are lab grown diamonds real diamonds ? Im so confused
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Intrusive thoughts. vent art 🏳️‍⚧️🇦🇷
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
亲爱的德国朋友,听说你们阴茎不能勃起,因为你们一旦勃起,阴茎的角度与你们的纳粹礼手势高度重合,这是真的吗?无恶意,谢谢🌹
Liebe Chinesen, stimmt es, dass eure Polizisten "Lang Fing Fang" heißen?
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
this historical knovel im reading has an emperor who's in love with his favorite son and made him drink a uterus-forming "medicine" for four years
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Thinking abt this diva today
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
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“What was your biggest impact on the internet?” I showed off my eyes...
“What was your biggest impact on the internet?” I uhh………… sealed the Honmoon?
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literally every time lmao
I struck a nerve 😭 what a fragile phaggot
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do you guys like this pamphlet at my uni??
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Captain Shitpost retweeted
My mom convincing me to clean my room by telling me that messy rooms are malebrained:
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