Jim Aguilar

I've been doing math problems for fun lately and I wasn't ready for this manifestation of depression.

Shrek was a NIMBY

My favorite type of redneck is turn your pontoon into a work trailer rednecks.

People assuming I'm rich cause i own a restaurant 😂😂 jokes on you. I'm broker than ever.

I truly wish I could just have an employee that worked as hard as I do. Like not too much to ask in my opinion.

Servers swear they are "solely responsible" for bringing in tips as if they made the cocktails and cooked all the food they're serving.....

It's been months since I've had a full week of employees working their full schedule without someone calling out and me having to cover and I'm really fucking tired of not having scheduled days off.

My mom finally caught me smoking for the first time at 29.

I swear I have to have a no-good-dirty-rotten-pig-stealing-great-great-grandfather.

Have your dad casually tell you he doesn't enjoy your company. It'll make your day, I promise.

Don't. Lip. Trout!!!

Today is one of those "Fuck that stingray that took Steve Irwin from us" kind of days.

Fuck these fucking steak sandwich ass motherfuckers.

How do you hop in someone's dms if you just want to be friends with them? Like I'm just trying to make new friends out here lol

Posted something semi-political on Facebook like I'm not a business owner in a small southern town.... oh well, fuck it.

A lot of people who made jokes about George Floyd dying or the kid in Kenosha killing people are now suddenly saying not to joke about this sub situation...

My dad stole a joke from me and told it today at a party, and it killed, and I've never been so mad at this man.

I forgot my dad's best friend died of Covid when he was hospitalized 2 years ago and I've been spiraling all day.

I'm getting so old. I rolled my ankle last night breaking up a fight that lasted 2 seconds and I'm sore as fuck.

Customer: "You know I'm gonna tip you good." *$7 on a $63 tab....*