Catherine N. Kiruyi

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐆𝐆𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐄 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐀𝐋𝐊 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 💔🤍 To many people, I am a mother of four. But what many don’t know is that, for my husband and I, our journey to having these four beautiful children has not been as easy as it may appear. Perhaps we could have had more children, or welcomed them earlier, but our story has been filled with silent battles, heartbreak, prayers, and tears. Some women struggle to conceive. Others conceive but experience spontaneous abortions (miscarriages). Some carry the pain of losing pregnancies they had already fallen in love with, while others endure years of waiting, hoping, and praying for the cry of a baby in their homes. Yet, society can be so cruel. “She can’t even give her husband a child.” “She is barren.” “What is wrong with her?” People make these comments without knowing the tears shed behind closed doors, the hospital visits, the countless prayers, the disappointments, or the pain of watching another month pass without the answer they have been waiting for. Behind every woman’s fertility journey, there may be a story the world knows nothing about. These experiences have taught me that life is often much deeper than what we see. Sometimes, there are biological explanations that require medical attention. Sometimes, our faith leads us to seek God in ways we never have before. And sometimes, we find ourselves holding on to God even when we do not understand why we are going through what we are going through. One thing I have learned is that God remains God, even in our pain. The Bible tells us that children are a heritage from the Lord (Psalm 127:3). Jesus came that we may have life and have it abundantly (John 10:10). When I lost a pregnancy, I was broken. It was a pain I cannot fully explain. I cried, I questioned, and I prayed like never before. A few months later, God blessed us with a baby girl, and later, a baby boy. Today, I am a mother of four, but that blessing does not erase the pain of the pregnancies I lost or the journey that brought me here. Sometimes, I go to the hospital and the doctor asks, “How many pregnancies have you had?” And I have to say EIGHT. Yet, I have four children. That number carries a story. A story of lives I hoped to hold, dreams I carried, losses I grieved, and moments when I had to gather the pieces of my heart and trust God again. It is a reminder that the number of children a woman has is not always the full story of her motherhood journey. So, please, NEVER MOCK A WOMAN WHO IS TRYING TO CONCEIVE. Never make jokes about her womb. Never pressure her to give her husband a child. Never assume that because she has no children, she has not tried. And never assume that because she has children today, her journey was easy. You may be looking at a woman who has cried herself to sleep, buried dreams, endured miscarriages, faced medical challenges, and prayed prayers she has never shared with anyone. Let us learn to be gentle with one another. Let us replace judgment with compassion, insensitive questions with kindness, and assumptions with understanding. To every woman waiting for a positive pregnancy test, to every woman who has experienced a miscarriage, to every woman who has lost a baby, and to every woman silently fighting a battle no one knows about: I see you. Your pain is real. Your story matters. And you are worthy of love, respect, and compassion. May God comfort every grieving heart, strengthen every woman who is still waiting, and give us the grace to trust Him even when the journey is painful. And may we never forget that behind some of the happiest smiles are stories of battles that were fought in silence. Please, be kind. You never know what someone has had to survive to become who they are today. ❤️🙏🏽