Raising Mothers

ALT How would your kid describe it? I asked them! Zuri (almost 7yo) said: she respects us and we respect her; she’s kind; if I want a smoothie or a snack and she has to pay for it, she would get it for me even if she didn’t have to. Layla (10yo) said: She’s really nice to me and she’s strict when she needs to be; it’s really healthy; I love having her as a mom and wouldn’t wish for anyone else as my mom.

ALT How would you describe your relationship with your kids? I’d describe it as one rooted in respect, and actually liking and loving each other. I never want my daughters to obey me out of fearing me, I want them to do so because they respect me. Fear is a short-term tool that loses its power when kids stop being afraid – so it’s useless to me. We play together, we apologize to each other, and we affirm each other, and life isn’t perfect, especially navigating single motherhood, but I am cultivating a relationship with them that lets them know I am a safe space, a mom who wants the best for them, and a mom who expects them to give their best in life as well.