Roth G. (@RothNotIRA) profile picture

Roth G.

@RothNotIRA

I flew too close to the sun on the wings of pastrami.

 Seattle, WA
Joined December 2011
  • Tweets299
  • Following73
  • Followers40
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Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)Photo by Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)
My 9YO: Hey Dad, now you're eligible for Cologuard. #birthday #halfwayto90
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My 8YO: How do you spell apocalypse?
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Me during dinner to my 7YO: How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat? My 7YO: Wait! You made pudding!?
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Playing Uno with my 7YO: What do I get if I win? Me: Bragging rights. My 7YO: Bragging rights are a terrible reward.
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Image from Roth G. (@RothNotIRA)
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My 6YO: Dad, are you a legendary human?
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My 6YO, while pensively folding a napkin at the dinner table, "I don't know what I'm doing with my life."
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My 10YO just asked me to explain how tennis is scored. 5 seconds in, "Dad, nevermind, I really don't want to know."
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My (almost) 10YO: Dad, I haven't even touched a Lamborghini yet. Me: Yeah, there's a lot of things you haven't touched yet.
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Why don't you just get a dozen bagels so we can throw away four of them.
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My almost 10YO: I have way more hair on my head than dad. Me: That may be true, but I got you beat on my back, chest, armpits and other areas.
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Since the Universe has no center, you can’t be it.
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You can't eat and drink like you did in your 20s when you're in your 30s. You can't eat and drink like you did in your 30s when you're in your 40s. I don't like where this is going.
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My 9 YO: How long will it take for a germ to move one inch?
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My 9YO: Would it be painful to stick your hand in a black hole?
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My 9 YO: Ouch, I just hit my head on the first aid kit!
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My 9YO: What if a cat was allergic to itself?
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We are grieving with Parkland. But we are not powerless. Caring for our kids is our first job. And until we can honestly say that we're doing enough to keep them safe from harm, including long overdue, common-sense gun safety laws that most Americans want, then we have to change.
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Chris Murphy on the Florida school shooting: "Let me just note once again for my colleagues, that this happens nowhere else other than the U.S.A.... We are responsible for a level of mass atrocity that happens in this country with zero parallel anywhere else." (via ABC)
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The @EPA lost 703 employees in the first 9 months of the Trump admin. About 41% of those had the title scientist, expert or other specialization. They’ve hired 129. Less than 6% of new hires have the title scientist, expert or other specialization. propub.li/2BZ2b1I
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