Teethson

When a trump was on the cover of @TIME . Did anyone call it a MAGA zine? Feel like I missed a good joke opportunity there...

It took me so long to sign in I forgot what I was gonna post. But trust me it was gonna be pretty funny...

Man I love shitty service at the airport bar. Not tipping on a 15 dollar beer is almost worth the price of admission.

Me waiting to get on a plane: IMM BORRRRED!

Why does my apartment never run out of dust

I dont think comets are trustworthy

Capitalism has taught us to care about representation in advertisements.

Kanye haters are the same people who thought Van gogh was crazy for cutting his ear off.

My back just farted.

Autocorrect changing the word war torn to cartoon must be a metaphor or something right?

If you eat Tim Hortons pizza you are going to hell when you die.

Time is flies

Is pool gay? Chalking up your stick. Getting your ball in the hole. Aim for the triangle. Stripes....

Brisket is a satanic meat

Did anyone ever figure out what was the deal with that guy in mortal kombat that was all like "Whoopsieee!". Outta nowhere? I hated that guy..

I'm taking the Pacific Blue Cross Health Challenge. Support my healthy goal with a vote. pbchealthchallenge.ca/resolu… #pbchealthchallenge

Dudes at the bar keep talking about the glory days of finger eleven and hedley. Guess they were managing them. Personally I think the best years are are ahead. The years they're not playing music anymore.

Remember when Beavis and butthead did America? Now look at it.

I don't care who I offend, Im still dressing as grimace this Halloween.