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The Babylon Bee

@TheBabylonBee

Fake news you can trust 🐝

 United States
linktr.ee/babylonbee
Joined February 2016
  • Tweets38.5K
  • Following8
  • Followers5.3M
19.8KMedia
Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)Photo by The Babylon Bee (@TheBabylonBee)
James Comey Produces Letter Signed By 51 Former Intelligence Officials Saying He's Totally Innocent buff.ly/UqtwfGO
James Comey Produces Letter Signed By 51 Former Intelligence Officials Saying He's Totally Innocent

James Comey Produces Letter Signed By 51 Former Intelligence Officials Saying He's Totally Innocent

ALEXANDRIA, VA — At his arraignment on charges of making false statements and obstruction, former FBI Director James Comey produced a letter signed by 51 former intelligence officials testifying to...

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Voter Turnout In Minnesota Expected To Be Over 130% buff.ly/GSnOGrz
Voter Turnout In Minnesota Expected To Be Over 130%

Voter Turnout In Minnesota Expected To Be Over 130%

ST. PAUL, MN — Voter turnout for the Minnesota midterms is expected to exceed 130%, sources said.

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Mamdani Charges Man With Hate Crime For Cleaning Graffiti Off 9/11 Memorial buff.ly/KPOZqF3
Mamdani Charges Man With Hate Crime For Cleaning Graffiti Off 9/11 Memorial

Mamdani Charges Man With Hate Crime For Cleaning Graffiti Off 9/11 Memorial

NEW YORK, NY — At the direction of Mayor Zoran Mamdani, authorities detained a janitor who removed red graffiti from New York's 9/11 Memorial and have charged him with a hate crime.

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IT'S GO TIME: Mormons Prepare For One Evening Of Year When Everyone Will Answer Their Door buff.ly/hPaazgw
IT'S GO TIME: Mormons Prepare For One Evening Of Year When Everyone Will Answer Their Door

IT'S GO TIME: Mormons Prepare For One Evening Of Year When Everyone Will Answer Their Door

SALT LAKE CITY, UT — The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is in the midst of preparations for what it says is the busiest time of the year for its missionaries — the one evening every year...

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Was LeBron Disrespecting The National Anthem? Watch This And Decide

Was LeBron Disrespecting The National Anthem? Watch This And Decide

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DHS Agents Seize Ilhan Omar's Phone But Decide To Let Her Keep Pager buff.ly/lDpQuuJ
DHS Agents Seize Ilhan Omar's Phone But Decide To Let Her Keep Pager

DHS Agents Seize Ilhan Omar's Phone But Decide To Let Her Keep Pager

U.S. — Sources confirmed on Thursday that, following a raid on Rep. Ilhan Omar's home on October 12, DHS officials seized her mobile phone, but decided to let her keep a pager.

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Brought to you by: @paginghezbollah -- check out the documentary hitting theaters tomorrow! buff.ly/TFJHzKp
Paging Hezbollah — A Documentary Experience

Paging Hezbollah — A Documentary Experience

The untold story of the people, planning, and decision behind one operation years in the making.

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Drunken Partiers On Streets Of Milwaukee Surprised To Learn Brewers Won World Series buff.ly/KnMUpUL
Drunken Partiers On Streets Of Milwaukee Surprised To Learn Brewers Won World Series

Drunken Partiers On Streets Of Milwaukee Surprised To Learn Brewers Won World Series

MILWAUKEE, WI — Drunken partiers stumbling down the streets of downtown Milwaukee were reportedly surprised to learn the Brewers had won the World Series.

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Democrats Discover Innovative Strategy Of Promising Free Stuff To Stupid People buff.ly/i4ilS81
Democrats Discover Innovative Strategy Of Promising Free Stuff To Stupid People

Democrats Discover Innovative Strategy Of Promising Free Stuff To Stupid People

NEW YORK, NY — Democratic Party strategists were thrilled this week after they stumbled upon an innovative new strategy of winning elections by promising free stuff to stupid people.

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9 Blatantly Obvious Christ Figures In 'Dune' buff.ly/cehTGYb
9 Blatantly Obvious Christ Figures In 'Dune'

9 Blatantly Obvious Christ Figures In 'Dune'

It's the most important question you can ask, no matter which movie you're watching: "who is the Christ figure in this movie?" And there's no better movie to ask that about than Dune Part Two. Well,...

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Lazy Adam Just Going To Call This One 'Fly' buff.ly/ZFPeJvq
Lazy Adam Just Going To Call This One 'Fly'

Lazy Adam Just Going To Call This One 'Fly'

GARDEN OF EDEN—A lackadaisical Adam really phoned it in with his latest animal name, deciding to just call the flying bug he was presented with 'fly'.

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San Francisco Store Clerk Confused As Shopper Actually Tries To Pay For Merchandise buff.ly/8twH7so
San Francisco Store Clerk Confused As Shopper Actually Tries To Pay For Merchandise

San Francisco Store Clerk Confused As Shopper Actually Tries To Pay For Merchandise

SAN FRANCISCO—A cashier working the closing shift at a small mom-and-pop store on Sutter St. was left shocked and bewildered when a customer tried to pay for her items.

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Strategic, Skill-Based Board Game Becomes Stupid Game Of Random Chance Following Loss buff.ly/Af105MZ
Strategic, Skill-Based Board Game Becomes Stupid Game Of Random Chance Following Loss

Strategic, Skill-Based Board Game Becomes Stupid Game Of Random Chance Following Loss

MEMPHIS, TN—Local man Quinton Parker went to a friend's house Friday afternoon, ready to finally play a skill-based board game perfect for strategic masterminds like himself. Unfortunately, there was...

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Zombie At Halloween Party Turns Out To Just Be Mitch McConnell buff.ly/7GFAda0
Zombie At Halloween Party Turns Out To Just Be Mitch McConnell

Zombie At Halloween Party Turns Out To Just Be Mitch McConnell

WASHINGTON, DC — A man thought to be wearing a terrifying zombie costume at an area Halloween party turned out to be Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell.

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Americans Unanimously Agree To Vote For Whichever Candidate Stops Sending Them Campaign Donation Text Messages buff.ly/VK9Wbie
Americans Unanimously Agree To Vote For Whichever Candidate Stops Sending Them Campaign Donation...

Americans Unanimously Agree To Vote For Whichever Candidate Stops Sending Them Campaign Donation...

PHILADELPHIA, PA — Americans on both sides of the political divide have finally united under a single issue: every single American in the United States has agreed to vote for whichever candidate...

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Duolingo Introduces ‘Kamala Harris’ As Its Newest Language buff.ly/apNdODA
Duolingo Introduces ‘Kamala Harris’ As Its Newest Language

Duolingo Introduces ‘Kamala Harris’ As Its Newest Language

PITTSBURG, PA — Language learning app Duo Lingo announced this week that it will be rolling out a new language called "Kamala Harris" to help people understand the former Vice President.

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Starving African Children Raise Money To Feed Ariana Grande buff.ly/tqAgXGc
Starving African Children Raise Money To Feed Ariana Grande

Starving African Children Raise Money To Feed Ariana Grande

MEKELLE, ETHIOPIA — Starving African children bravely banded together this week to raise money to feed singer and actress Ariana Grande.

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9 Subtle Clues Your Wife Is Pregnant buff.ly/3Sa6aJo
9 Subtle Clues Your Wife Is Pregnant

9 Subtle Clues Your Wife Is Pregnant

Sponsored by:

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Doctor's Office Sends Helpful Appointment Reminder Via Email, Phone, Text, Certified Letter, Telegram, Carrier Pigeon, And Smoke Signal buff.ly/a7thOcw
Doctor's Office Sends Helpful Appointment Reminder Via Email, Phone, Text, Certified Letter,...

Doctor's Office Sends Helpful Appointment Reminder Via Email, Phone, Text, Certified Letter,...

ARVADA, CO — The local dentist office of Doctor Carl M. Higgins continued the practice of sending his patients an appointment reminder email, phone call, text, certified letter, telegram, carrier...

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Abdul El-Sayed Promises To Any Jews Who Vote for Him That He'll Kill Them Last buff.ly/81uFpPR
Abdul El-Sayed Promises To Any Jews Who Vote for Him That He'll Kill Them Last

Abdul El-Sayed Promises To Any Jews Who Vote for Him That He'll Kill Them Last

LANSING, MI — Democratic Senate candidate Abdul El-Sayed sought to reassure nervous Jewish citizens that if they vote for him, he will kill them last.

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