Guangdong Ultimate Weapon — Unit 3, Room 1106: BIG BLACK COCKROACH. Ultimate unkillable titanium body.
Listening to phonk, enjoying my deep dark life. All you little babies are gonna die. Unlike me — I can run, I can fly, even lava steam can't make medie. You flush me down the toilet four times, and I get back every time , fly onto your body, and shit on you at midnight. I make over 6,000 babies in four years and drive you completely insane.
Yo, look at this motherfucker opening the door and giving me perfect timing. Bro doesn't look around at all, like he's watching Pornhub while walking. His shitty movement looks like a fucking maggot. Watch me get behind you — FLY HACK ON. You desperately turn around trying to find me? Too bad, you can't even see my shadow. Now you're panicking and praying for me to die. Meanwhile, I'm holding back the urge to fly straight into your mouth the entire time.
Ultimate technique: if the enemy doesn't move, I don't move.
Oh shit, you moved? Watch me kite your ass back and forth.
By the way, sorry bro — I've already crawled over every single piece of food in your entire house.
Now look at these Attack-on-Titan-tier Guangdong–Hong Kong–Macau mega wings. Wings out, eagle mode activated. My feelers want to drink some blood.
I know all you guys want me dead. I'm sorry, but my whole life is meant to fuck up Guangdong.
See‘ya, motherfucker, go die.