shokunin of serendipity
Joined January 2020
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please look at my friend’s cat learning his first maple story run. beautiful tradition passed by generations, parent and child
things I’m full of atm:
blood
chai
warmth
love
musings
audacity
grief
excitement
so much love
uncertainty
equanimity
song
paradoxes
observations
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date idea: get locked in a room for 12h and take the oxford all souls exam together
there are versions of ourselves that live on in the mouths of people who once knew us, dusty, sentimental
when I spent a lot of time in Germany some doting people practically renamed me with the nicknames Frettchen and Fräulein. it's been very long since I've been called either that I basically forgot them until an old acquaintance today called me Fräulein and resurfaced a flood of fondness for a past chapter. I wonder which other versions I entirely forgot that are preserved in others
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first you’re like oh how can i love people more because that’s the most enjoyable way to relate to people. so then you realise you have to learn how to connect better and how to open your heart more so then you have to feel the emotions that close the heart and then you’re like why disconnection, oh bc fear and shame. and you’re like how do i come back into connection, well you have to “say the thing” so you’re like how do i say the thing, well you have to have clarity so how do i have clarity, you have to feel the emotions and also know what you want/need, so how do you know what you want/need, you gotta spend time getting to know your internal landscape and feel the fear of the other person’s reaction, and then you’re like ok damn they reacted badly, so then you have to learn how to do repair, how do you do repair, you gotta feel the emotions, have clarity, say the thing, catch your heart closing and feel what closes it and you gotta feel the intensity of the vulnerability, and then you’re like damn, i love people.
