Gjheps

The owner of this car is called Kirubi, a man equipped with all the horizontal engineering apparatus until proven otherwise. While I was busy in my humble Hacienda, conducting an intensive cutout search operation belonging to my yellow yellow damsel, this man who was high as a kite, decided to use my car as a handbrake. He hit my car and destroyed the bumper and fog lights. Management briefed me about the incident the following morning. After a serious man to man talk, we agreed that I take the car to a well known garage along Mirema Drive, obtain a quotation, and inform him immediately. I followed the agreement to the letter. The car was repaired, but the moment the bill landed, Kirubi performed a disappearing act & refused to pay for the damages. I repainted the bumper from my own pocket & bought new fog lights,, all attempts to reach him became as useless as Kaluma’s brains. Then out of nowhere, the gentleman sent me a video of himself wearing a wig, claiming he is not a man and that I should come collect my money in cash. Hii ni Maajabu ya Musa. The man was trying to seduce me. Imagine taking your car for repairs and returning with a bill, only for the person responsible to return wearing a wig and introducing a new identity into the negotiations! Mama watoto who's an advocate of the high court is wondering whether this case will fall under the small claims court or it's a case of identity crisis. I immediately reminded the mumu that my money has absolutely nothing to do with his personal identity or whatever he is trying to communicate. The agreement was simple,, you damaged my car, you pay for the repairs. The mumu resembles Mulamwah, but apparently he wants walimwengu to identify him as a woman. At this point I need therapy, not only has my money drunk water, I'm equally tormented by this whole whole scenario. Mama watoto who is an Advocate of the High Court is thoroughly confused. She’s wondering whether this is a case for the Small Claims Court or a special case of identity crisis. Hata kuandika demand letter imekuwa ngumu. She doesn’t know whether to address the mumu as Mr or Ms on the letterhead. She has advised me to forget about the money and accept that it has joined the missing persons register. According to her, I should protect my Sundus and avoid turning a car repair dispute into an unnecessary drama with members of team sisi kwa sisi. If anyone knows the owner of this car, it's a prado TX KDJ 401X, tell the mumu that sisi kama walala hoii, we shall find him, and he'll point to us where his Kilgoris is located for him to identify himself as daughter of Agrippina, failure to which he'll see what Onyango One Touch saw in Namba Okana back in 1906. Chesaa!!