christopher caen

They bring the bread before you have even settled into the booth. This is not a gesture of kindness. It is a siege tactic designed to destroy the structural integrity of the human ego. The rolls arrive in a basket lined with red paper, pulsing with thermal energy, glowing like freshly forged ingots from the fires of Mount Doom. Beside them lies a silver tub of cinnamon-honey butter. "I will eat one," I said to myself. A man who believes he can eat one Texas Roadhouse roll is a man who believes he can negotiate with a tsunami. The bread does not require chewing. It surrenders instantly to the teeth, collapsing into a sweet, yeasty cloud of pure dopamine. The butter melts on contact, weaponized with enough sugar to fell an ox. I had ordered an eighteen-ounce ribeye. It was resting on a grill ten yards away. It had a future. It had a purpose. By the time the waitress returned with my water, the basket was empty. Only a few crumbs remained, like ashes after a forest fire. She looked at the empty basket. She did not ask. She was an agent of chaos. She produced a second basket from beneath the tray, steaming, golden, fatal. "Need more butter, darlin'?" I looked at the woman. I saw what she was doing. She was attempting to drown my mortal flesh in carbohydrates before the protein could arrive to save me. This was the ancient hospitality of the frontier—so aggressive, so terrifyingly abundant, that to refuse it was to insult the concept of survival itself. I did not refuse. "Yes, ma'am," I said, my voice shaking. When the ribeye arrived twenty minutes later, I looked upon it with the hollow eyes of a man who has already consumed two thousand calories of wheat and lies. I took the steak home in a styrofoam box. The rolls had won. The rolls always win.

This is such an embarrassing post-mortem on the OpenAI/Anthropic security incidents. It's full of excuses. If the labs don't cut ties with this partner, it's clear this is all just theatre.

In all seriousness, Jed York’s arrest over a $140 prostitute shows the level he’s willing to go to as a leader to attract the best talent. Dollars and cents matter, splurging on your roster means cuts to your prostitute budget, it’s just simple math. Proud to be a 49er.

Work to bring back the Expos is temporarily on hold while we start up several life insurance companies

AI agents are booking travel, signing into websites, and acting on your behalf. That creates a new security problem: until now, letting an agent log in meant exposing your credentials to the model. Today, with @AnthropicAI, we're changing that. 1Password for @claudeai lets Claude use your stored credentials to complete real-world tasks without your passwords or one-time codes ever reaching the model, its memory, or Anthropic's systems. You stay in control and approve which credentials an agent can use. 1Password handles authentication behind the scenes. Available now on Mac for business, family, and individual customers. bit.ly/4bLP5EJ

Are we building AI infrastructure for the past or the future? For years, "hyperscale" meant massive, centralized data centers. That worked for training models. But training was just the prologue. The agentic era changes the math entirely. Unlike a simple chatbot, an AI agent might run dozens of iterative inference loops to complete a single task. If every step requires a 200ms round-trip to a distant mega-region, compounding latency and egress costs destroy the business case. According to @IDC research, by 2029: 🔷 1B+ active AI agents will execute 217B+ actions daily. 🔷 Inference workloads will consume 3.7 teratokens every single day. Centralized setups can't sustain this. True scale is shifting from mass to velocity and proximity. The metric of the next decade isn't how much compute you can concentrate in one place—it’s how effectively you can distribute it. I dive into this architectural shift in this guest blog for @Akamai akamai.com/blog/cloud/new-de…

Critical Copilot vulnerability allowed hackers to steal 2FA code from users arstechnica.com/security/202…