Anointing

Hear me out. Every single time I've genuinely liked a guy and we've tried to make things work, it has never ended well. I can count at least three occasions. Now, there's a guy I really like, and he likes me too, but I don't want anything beyond that. It's like, I really, realllyyy like this guy, but I wouldn't date you. I'd fuck you if I had the chance, but I don't want to date you. I don't even want to entertain the idea of commitment. It's like knowing something is going to end badly without even having to try it out, so you just want to enjoy it and have it to yourself whenever you can. (It's kinda selfish, but yeah. 😭) It's almost like you're trying to protect yourself, and even this person, from the possibility of ending up in an emotional turmoil. And the crazy part is, it's not even that you don't want him. You do. You just don't want to risk what might come with having him.