@metalsucks

Metal news, tour dates, videos, gossip, reviews and more.

 New York, USA
metalsucks.net
Joined February 2009
  • Tweets52.1K
  • Following1.1K
  • Followers99.1K
16.6KMedia
Do I Suck For… Using AMORPHIS Lyrics To Get Laid? metalsucks.net/2026/07/15/do…

Do I Suck For... Using AMORPHIS Lyrics To Get Laid?

In this week's 'Do I Suck?' we question whether submitter "Am0rph1sMor0n" is in the wrong for passing off Amorphis lyrics as his love poem.

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DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: IF THESE TREES COULD TALK – THE HIDDEN HAND metalsucks.net/2026/07/14/di…

DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: IF THESE TREES COULD TALK – THE HIDDEN HAND

Is Dave Mustcomplain capable of ever liking a record? Or is it just in his name?

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DROPOCALYPSE FRIDAY: For The Sceney-Boppers In Your Life metalsucks.net/2026/07/10/dr…

DROPOCALYPSE FRIDAY: For The Sceney-Boppers In Your Life

On this week's Dropocalypse, we focus on vinyl for those sceney-boppers you have in your life, including Bring Me The Horizon's newest LP.

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NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: How To Upgrade Your Backline By Wrecking Your Van metalsucks.net/2026/07/09/ne…

NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: How To Upgrade Your Backline By Wrecking Your Van

This week on Net Worthless, Johnny Spreadsheets offers aspiring musicians some possible, but rather creative solutions to financial problems.

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Do I Suck For… Walking Out On a Date Because He Liked Lame Music? metalsucks.net/2026/07/08/do…

Do I Suck For... Walking Out On a Date Because He Liked Lame Music?

This week's 'Do I Suck?' submission might make you question your own music taste when it comes to getting down in the bedroom.

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DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: COPROLITH – PUTRESCENCE metalsucks.net/2026/07/07/di…

DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: COPROLITH – PUTRESCENCE

On this week's Disgruntled Dad Reviews, Dave Mustcomplain reviews a Canadian metal act after the 4th of July.

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MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: NEKROGOBLIKON Turns 20, And Now We Are Too Old For LEONARDO DICAPRIO! metalsucks.net/2026/07/06/mo…

MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: NEKROGOBLIKON Turns 20, And Now We Are Too Old For LEONARDO...

John Goblikon of Nekrogoblikon pens the legend of how the band started and their 20 year journey, in a rather... colorful way.

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DROPOCALYPSE FRIDAY: To Keep You Occupied This Freedom Weekend metalsucks.net/2026/07/03/dr…

DROPOCALYPSE FRIDAY: To Keep You Occupied This Freedom Weekend

MetalSucks' Dropocalypse Friday gives some advice for the physical media collectors ahead of this coming Independence Day.

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NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: All Engagement Is Good Engagement, Something Something, Algorithm metalsucks.net/2026/07/02/ne…

NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: All Engagement Is Good Engagement, Something Something,...

Johnny Spreadsheets offers some advice on making money through social media on this week's 'Net Worthless with Johnny Spreadsheets.'

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Do I Suck For… Making My Father-In-Law Bootleg Merch? metalsucks.net/2026/07/01/do…

Do I Suck For... Making My Father-In-Law Bootleg Merch?

This week's installment of 'Do I Suck?' looks at a submission from an anonymous user using their screenprinting skills for the greater good.

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DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: MASTERPLAN – METALMORPHOSIS metalsucks.net/2026/06/30/di…

DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: MASTERPLAN – METALMORPHOSIS

On this week's Disgruntled Dad Reviews, Dave Mustcomplain finds himself almost enjoying a new record... almost.

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MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: By Murdering An Orange Guy, GWAR is Actually Being Inclusive metalsucks.net/2026/06/29/mo…

MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: By Murdering An Orange Guy, GWAR is Actually Being Inclusive

John Goblikon of Nekrogoblikon gets rather philosophical on this week's MondaySucks, as he offers a new take on the recent GWAR performance.

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DROPOCALYPSE FRIDAY: For The Forgotten Father’s Day Blues metalsucks.net/2026/06/26/dr…

DROPOCALYPSE FRIDAY: For The Forgotten Father's Day Blues

On this Friday's Dropocalypse, we focus on some post-Father's Day releases for both man or child who chose not to deal with the past holiday.

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NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: The One Data Center Secret That Will Make You Rich metalsucks.net/2026/06/25/ne…

NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: The One Data Center Secret That Will Make You Rich

Johnny Spreadsheets has a real out there idea this week for Net Worthless as modern wealth creation requires vision, or so he says.

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DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: SOULBURN – THE BRAVEHEART OF NIGHTMARES metalsucks.net/2026/06/23/di…

DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: SOULBURN – THE BRAVEHEART OF NIGHTMARES

Dave Mustcomplain takes his therapist's advice and tried to be openminded. It was a journey – an eventful one at that.

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MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: Death-Metal Is Cool, But Have You Guys Ever Tried Life-Metal?!? metalsucks.net/2026/06/22/mo…

MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: Death-Metal Is Cool, But Have You Guys Ever Tried Life-Metal?!? 

John Goblikon offers a rather profound experience he had while reflecting on his mortality – while doomscrolling about a band named Death.

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NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: Cutting Corners With AI Has Never Been Easier! metalsucks.net/2026/06/18/ne…

NET WORTHLESS With JOHNNY SPREADSHEETS: Cutting Corners With AI Has Never Been Easier!

Johnny Spreadsheets offers an unexpected tip on how to use AI to your advantage this week on Net Worthless.

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Do I Suck… For Farting On My Vocalist’s Microphone? metalsucks.net/2026/06/17/do…

Do I Suck... For Farting On My Vocalist's Microphone?

This week's 'Do I Suck?' installment comes from a rogue farter who weaponized his gas to attack his vocalist after complaining too much.

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DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: FUNEBRARUM – Beckoning The Void Of Eternal Silence metalsucks.net/2026/06/16/di…

DISGRUNTLED DAD REVIEWS With DAVE MUSTCOMPLAIN: FUNEBRARUM – Beckoning The Void Of Eternal Silence

Dave Mustcomplain reviews Funebrarum's newest record, 'Beckoning The Void Of Eternal Silence' for this week's Disgruntled Dad Reviews.

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MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: Oh My Gob, I Just Found Out JAVIER BARDEM Loves Metal And Now, I’m Fully Bricked Up metalsucks.net/2026/06/15/mo…

MONDAYSUCKS With JOHN GOBLIKON: Oh My Gob, I Just Found Out JAVIER BARDEM Loves Metal And Now, I'm...

John Goblikon of Nekrogoblikon heard that famous actor Javier Bardem likes metal, and Goblikon has a lot to say about it.

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