.

Obsessed with going into severe credit card debt then bailing myself out twice a year to prove I still got it

This is the dating economy that made Amy Winehouse say “feel like a lady and you my ladyboy”

First puberty: butt Second puberty: buccal fat removal

I love saying male bullshit like “I’m getting better for us”

I used to be so full of life. Today I used a cigarette to catalyze the effects of my stimulants

Every time I open Instagram a former they/them from high school is engaged heterosexually

You let your guard down around a Canadian then they start using Celsius

I can only double triple text if you’ve humiliated yourself before me as a form of deposit

You look easy to convert to Islam

Your nigga just posted another what’s in my bag

Americans be like “I know, I checked your location :)”

In my late twenties now where’s the conscious man in questionable hats I was promised ?

Ranking things dear to you is evil

I’m going to be honest. Don’t ever ask me my top three anything

Why’re so many men sick about how many story likes women get? I thought they were harmless and meant nothing?