as seen in @ThePoke, @Huffpost, @cheezburger, @BoredPanda, @BuzzFeed, one of top 40 tweets of 2020 in the @ChicagoTribune, @ReadersDigestCA
Planet Claire
Joined March 2014
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Here’s the funny thing about where I live. When I bought my house none of my neighbours offered to help me move in but since the. every one of them has offered to help me move out
Jimothy is what happens when RFK starts eating roadkill before it’s actually dead.
I will take no questions on this matter
He forgot the “and everyone clapped” part
Some silly English bitch at the football game screamed “human trafficker” and recorded it for her TikTok.
I asked her if it was aimed at me and she pissed her pants and said “no no sorry no”
And her boyfriend looked like he was about to cry. He didn’t even defend his girl.
10k retweets I post picture of her face.
Yesterday we discovered that the freezer in our garage had been left open and the 18 lb turkey I had in there was thawing
which explains why I had the oven on 350° for 7 hours today when we are in the middle of a heat wave
cause who doesn’t want a turkey dinner when it’s 35°
Saw this and it reminded me of the time my 4 YO walked into the family room (full of guests) and said “mom can I bring this giant finger to school tomorrow for show and tell?” and held up my dildo
My husband never knew middle aged women could move that fast
Kids today will never understand how a company sold hairbrushes door-to-door and frankly neither can I
The Fuller Brush Company operated like this until 1985 while offering a lifetime guarantee on any brush you bought
Hilarious!
Jon Stewart Ribs JD Vance Over Alleged ‘Pick and Wipe’ of Nose at Iran Peace Talks | Video thewrap.com/creative-content…
School ends next week in my city.
Wayfair just sent me an alert advertising their “back to school” sale. If I was in school I’d be totally pissed off 😠
