02Toxicc

Imposter syndrome perfectly sums up how I feel this morning. I’ve felt in no way, shape or form deserving of Sketches praise or anybody else’s for that matter. Me & the other FaZe boys did exactly what I would hope any other halfway decent person would. The “hero” comments and “you saved his life” shit is mildly uncomfortable to read/ hear. Idky. I’m just speaking candidly off the cuff. Nowhere else to really put these thoughts. Just processing this shit. Today was a big reminder of why I bounced off this whack internet shit in the first place. It isn’t reality, people are so disconnected and so eager for approval and likes that they get so wrapped up in this game that they dehumanize an actual human. Push someone so hard that they really consider taking their own life. Really insane being behind the scenes and so close to all of it. Homie was so sad, I’ve never seen sadness like that. Everyone in that same room saw it too. I just thank fucking god he’s chillen, safe, feeling even a little bit better. It could’ve been a much darker day yesterday and I just thank god it went the other way. Lessons in that.