ALT Panel 1: Shen is sitting on a bench in a gym locker room, wearing a sweaty yellow tank-top (and sweating, himself), holding a water bottle, and talking to a guy with a towel slung over his shoulder. He has a disgruntled expression. He says "Bro I never should've hired the dark wizard as my fitness coach." Panel 2: A dark wizard is spotting Shen on the bench press. Shen is huffing lifting the weight. The dark wizard, who wears a red hood with grey horns and a purple cloak, and has a long pointy nose and fingers, small severe eyes, and a big dark brown beard and eyebrows, is saying "The path to TRUE power is not these plebeian exercises, but to know the 7 ARCANE UTTERANCES." Panel 3: Top-down view of Shen, sweating, frustrated, on the bench. "THEN JUST TELL ME THE UTTERANCES!!" he says. Panel 4: View from Shen's perspective of the wizard's long nose and face looking down at him sternly. "EARN THEM!!!!" he yells.
ALT Panel 1: Shen and the Dark Wizard are standing near the gym's big wall mirror. There is a dumbbell laying on the ground between them, closer to the mirror. Shen is leaning forward, one hand on his hips and the other pointing at the wizard, and saying "Y'know, I'm not convinced you're even strong enough to BE a fitness coach." Panel 2: Shen's hand points at the dumbbell on the ground near the mirror. He says "Lift that dumbbell." Panel 3: The Dark Wizard saying "I already AM lifting it." Shen raises his arms in exasperated confusion, saying "What??" Panel 4: Outside view of the gym. It, along with the chunk of earth it was standing on, is hovering in the air slightly, having dislodged itself from the ground below.
ALT Panel 1: In the foreground, Shen is sweating and breathing heavily, resting his hands on his knees, having just run a mile on an outdoor track. Far away in the background, on the other side of the track, the Dark Wizard is holding a stopwatch and saying "AN 8 MINUTE MILE?? AND YOU HOPE TO SURVIVE HEARING EVEN THE WEAKEST ARCANE UTTERANCE??" Panel 2: Shen stands up straight and swings around to look at the wizard. He raises his hands in an aggressive questioning pose and tells "HOW FAST IS >YOUR< MILE??" Panel 3: The wizard has suddenly manifested right behind Shen and puts his long, bony hand on Shen's shoulder. Red sparks fly around them, as if the remnants of a teleportation spell. "instantaneous," he hisses.
ALT Panel 1: The gym is floating in some sort of colorful space-like void, with stars and billows of space glitter casting rainbow reflections onto its surface. From inside the gym, the dark wizard says "BEWARE!! FOR WE ARE NOW TRAVELING BETWIXT DIMENSIONS." Panel 2: Closeup of the dark wizard's haggard face, dramatically bottom-lit with red. He says "All manner of monsters lurk here." Panel 3: A black girl with messy buns and teal-ish green glasses enters. She's carrying a grey gym bag and wearing a sports a dark brown sports bra and tights, and a shiny pink poofy crop jacket, along with shiny pink velcro sneakers. She's enthusiastically stepping in with a "DING" of the door bell. Panel 4: Shen looks at her, holding his green water bottle to his face, with the dark wizard in the background. Shen says "SHE seems pretty normal." Panel 5: Shen spits out his drink as he sees her maxing out the leg press machine, her legs bulging with muscle as the whole machine bends and threatens to fall
ALT The Fettermans’ cat, Potato, sitting on a bench next to Santa.
