Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2) header
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hijinks, tomfoolery, mischief & shenanigans

funkytown
Joined May 2019
Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)Photo by Secret Agent Randy Beans (@Rauer_2)
Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
I FELL OFF MY BED AND HIT MY HEAD REALLY HARD😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
I can't believe this. I'm a massive Nathan Fielder fan and I spent months auditioning for a singing competition thinking it was a fake metatextual element of a new TV show he was making. It turns out it was a genuine singing competition with no comedic framing whatsoever
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
English actor cast in a genre film: The whole thing is a bit silly really but the cast and crew were just fantastic American actor who just got cast as Cousin America (Captain America's Cousin): This is what the world needs right now
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
thread of headlines from newspaper archives about people with the same names as future famous people!!!!
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
misogyny checkpoint: what’s the first tweet that shows up when you search “women” on your page ?
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
😭😭😭
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les américains tu leur donne un outil de traduction automatique pour comprendre toutes les langues du monde bah ils comprennent quand même pas
Replying to @abshirjpk
Yeah yall having been calling us American Blacks in English. I said what I said.
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
EBITDA = Earnings Before I Trick Da Auditor
Anthropic has filed an S-1 registration statement with the SEC related to its proposed IPO. Read more: anthropic.com/news/s1-sec Legal disclaimer: A registration statement relating to these securities has been filed with the SEC but has not yet become effective. These securities may not be sold, nor may offers to buy be accepted, prior to the time the registration statement becomes effective. This post does not constitute an offer to sell or the solicitation of an offer to buy these securities, nor shall there be any sale of these securities in any state or jurisdiction in which such offer, solicitation or sale would be unlawful prior to registration or qualification under the securities laws of any such state or jurisdiction.
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
Recently rewatched Slow Horses and this time around it struck me that Lamb is not the hero (girlfriend leaves room) if Jackon Lamb was a fire truck he would be the biggest one in the world
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
October 26, 1982
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
When you find out your goat washed 💔💔💔
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
Boring Western News: Trump inflation Ukraine Gaza Trump Iran Serbian election news:
Заменик председника бирачког одбора у Деспотовцу је ПОЈЕО 2 гласачка листића.
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
Now I have an excuse to post my favourite ever twitter exchange again
🧵 Toby Young’s Free Speech Union (FSU) is reeling from internal grievances involving allegations of racism, workplace discrimination, and sexually inappropriate remarks by senior members of staff. What? Surely not! I'm old enough to remember when In January 2018, Toby Young was appointed to the board of the new universities regulator, the Office for Students, and his old tweets, mostly from 2009, quickly resurfaced. He had tweeted “What happened to Winkleman’s breasts Put on some weight girlie”, asked “Do Padma’s breasts look bigger than normal?”, said a female MP had “quite a cleavage”, and joked of a woman pictured with him that he “had my dick up her arse”. He called lesbians “dykes” and George Michael “queer as a coot”. He deleted around 50,000 tweets, a petition against him passed 220,000 signatures, and on 9 January he resigned, saying his appointment had “become a distraction”. The just announced controversy claims that a key figure in the campaign group, the chief operating officer, Sigrun Olafsdottir, departed late last week after employees alleged that she told a junior member of staff she would “never hire a black person” as a part of a one-on-one meeting late last year. The organisation’s legislative affairs director, Sam Armstrong, who is also head of communications for the Reform MP Robert Jenrick, has meanwhile been accused of making staff members uncomfortable by discussing the American actor Sydney Sweeney’s “assets” in a meeting with more than a dozen staff. The claims cap a difficult period for the FSU, founded by the Conservative life peer Toby Young, and which critics see as a partisan rallying point for anti-woke grievance. And they may complicate how the organisation seeks to publicly present itself, as a nonpartisan group that seeks to defend “free speech” from the overreach of censorious authorities – one which often raises money from its 50,000 members to do so. In July, the Guardian reported that the US state department had allocated $5m to the international umbrella organisation that oversees the FSU, part of a larger effort by the Trump administration to promote rightwing causes in Europe. The state department appeared to withdraw this grant after the Guardian reported on the allocation. In August, the Guardian reported on questions about the organisation’s practices around charity crowdfunding, centred on an instance in which the FSU appeared to raise £60,000 for a legal case that was ultimately fought pro-bono. Much of the FSU’s work consists of raising money for people who it argues have faced inappropriate consequences for exercising their right to free speech. Lord Young told the Guardian that that case was “not handled on an exclusively pro bono basis”, saying there was another lawyer involved and the person whose case it was had separate legal costs. These revelations have come alongside a period of internal turmoil. Eight members of the FSU’s small staff have departed within the past year. The Guardian understands that a crucial part of this disquiet has been the allegation of racism against Olafsdottir. The Guardian has spoken to multiple sources about these allegations and viewed documentation related to parts of the claims. Employees complained that Olafsdottir was frequently “hostile” towards younger members of staff. This alleged hostility was said to occur during the FSU’s in-person gatherings. The staff of the FSU work remotely but meet regularly for in-person events. These often take place at pubs and hotels, with some personnel said to drink heavily late into the night. Employees of the FSU described blurred boundaries and instances of aggression and discriminatory behaviour on the part of some senior staff during these sessions. Olafsdottir and Armstrong declined to comment. Young told the Guardian he could not comment on “internal employment matters”. (Continued...) theguardian.com/uk-news/2026…
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Yeah
do you know how utterly soul-destroying it is to see old pieces of text written by you with the full understanding that you will never be able to write that way again. you simply cannot string sentences together in the same manner. your lexicon has shrunk. your brain is fried
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
I've trained my dog to salivate at the sound of a bell thanks to my invention, the edible bell
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
Red Stripe at night, workers rights. Red Stripe in the morning, final warning.
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
Girlfriend texting me: I’m at the store do u need anything (2 minutes later): Hello ? Me 4 hours later: Sorry I was mixing your hair products together to make a potion. Can u go back and get chips
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
I leave the cinema thinking every movie is the greatest movie of all time, the atmosphere completely strips away my sense of objectivity for a good 24 hours
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
Can you imagine how much this guy is jacking off
🇫🇷🚨 Après 23 ANS sans bras, cet homme reçoit la 1re GREFFE des 2 bras et des épaules au monde. Il peut enfin ENLACER ses proches ! En 1998, Felix, électricien islandais, est électrocuté sur une ligne à haute tension. Il perd ses 2 bras. En 2021, à Lyon, des chirurgiens français lui greffent 2 bras et 2 épaules. En 2022, il enlace enfin sa fille et ses petits-enfants. (AFP)
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Secret Agent Randy Beans retweeted
New fusion political ideology called 'effective Maoism' where you work a high-flying finance job and then wire 10% of your income to communist guerillas.
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