Stifler (@Samzen_) header
Stifler (@Samzen_) profile picture

everything tech. all my football opinions are facts. Real Madrid. Leeds. Al-Nassr. Casemiro is the best DM in the history of football

Joined January 2011
Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)Photo by Stifler (@Samzen_)
Christian families always rush into doing a wedding when the girl gets pregnant so that they cheat God about "sex before marriage". funny
3
78
12
27
there’s no universe the midget is better than this monster
Paying tribute to his idol, CR7 🥹
119
Replying to @Cristiano
@Cristiano كريستاينو أتحداك تفهم وش قاعد أقول لك ... لكن ممكن تجي للنصر تكفى كريستيانو 😊
53
154
36
860
No one can stay this about fucken Messi
🚨 Pepe tears up explaining the feeling of playing behind Cristiano Ronaldo for Portugal: “I remember a game when we were under pressure and I cleared a ball without looking. It came straight back. “Cristiano turned round and said, ‘Pepe, give me something I can chase.’ “I said, ‘I’m trying to get us out.’ “He said, ‘Then give it to me.’ “I laughed afterwards because he was asking me to pick a pass while I had a striker trying to take my head off. But the next time I won it, I looked. He was already moving. I put it down the channel and suddenly their defenders were running towards their own goal. “That was a wonderful feeling as a centre-back. You’ve spent five minutes defending your box, shouting, getting your body in front of things, and then you hear the crowd because Cristiano has the ball. You can finally step up. You can breathe. “He gave me a lot of those breaths. “People will remember his goals against Sweden. I remember what it felt like at the other end when the match became difficult. You look up the pitch and he’s still making the run. You’re tired, he’s tired, everybody knows where the pass is going, and he still wants you to try it. “I used to ask him, ‘How do you know I can get it there?’ “He’d say, ‘You got it there before.’ “Sometimes that was all the encouragement you needed. He remembered the good pass you’d made, even when you were thinking about the last one you’d given away. “And then there was France in 2016. When he had to come off, I looked at him and knew how much it was hurting. We’d spoken about winning something for Portugal for so many years. Now we were in the final and he couldn’t stay on the pitch. “I remember thinking we had to give him a game he could bear to watch. “That became difficult as well, because every time you looked towards the touchline he was trying to come back on without actually coming back on. I thought, ‘Cristiano, please. We can only listen to one coach.’ “I kept thinking about what it would be like to walk back into that dressing room if we lost. You can tell your friend you gave everything, and he’ll believe you. But you also know he’d give anything to have been out there helping you. I wanted us to come back with something he could hold. “When Eder scored, I still had defending to do. People watching at home could jump up and celebrate. I was looking at the clock and trying to get everybody back where they needed to be. Every ball into our box felt like it had been in the air for a minute. “Then it was over. For once, I could look towards Cristiano without having to look straight back at the pitch. I’d spent years wanting him to get on the end of something. That night I just wanted to get over to him. “Even now, when I see the photographs, I remember how difficult it was to say anything properly. You start a sentence, somebody grabs you, then you see another teammate crying and you forget what you were trying to say. We’d imagined winning that trophy so many times. None of those conversations had prepared me for actually giving him a hug when it happened. “But when we lifted that trophy, I wanted him in the middle of everything. He’d helped get us to that night. And I knew the boy who’d wanted to win for Portugal was still there inside the man holding the cup. “Today somebody asked me what Portugal will miss most. There are so many football answers. The movement, the heading, the way he could turn a clearance into a chance. I’ll probably think of another one tomorrow. “Right now I’m thinking about the next time Portugal are defending a lead and somebody wins the ball near their own box. For years, before I even had it under control, I knew I’d hear him asking for it. “I’ll be watching from home. I think part of me will still look up to see where he’s running.”
130
he shot two dogs at point blank after feeding them cookies 😭
Johnny Flynn as Frankie on ‘MobLand’ Season 2 has to be one of the best TV characters this year.
1
131
Harry kills Frankie’s son in the latest episode. It’s going to be messy 😭😭🫢
19
these three cunts are the Portuguese first team players who haven’t posted Cristiano @Joao_neves87 @vitinha and Mendez. you got blood in your hands. You’ll die a very painful death
1
151
Stifler retweeted
Quand Giannis posait le « SIUUU » de Cristiano Ronaldo Via @ESPNFC
74
2,484
136
15,860
232,345
😂
Ruben Amorim and your shitty AC Milan,that money was for abortion.
92
SIUUUUUU 🇧🇷
224
6,031
100
71,324
415,395
The Ronaldo effect.
26
1,690
51
20,010
422,359
Stifler retweeted
A journey that began in August 2003 🇵🇹 Cristiano Ronaldo made history 👏
95
4,136
31
26,247
146,411
Stifler retweeted
Obrigado por tudo o que fizeste pela nossa Nação 💚🐐 Para sempre na história de Portugal 🇵🇹
159
7,670
46
56,229
297,719
Stifler retweeted
Billionaire Soccer Legend Cristiano Ronaldo Announces Retirement From Portugal National Team go.forbes.com/E7V-cw
204
4,377
217
28,979
378,687
2️⃣3️⃣4️⃣ caps. 1️⃣4️⃣6️⃣ goals. 3️⃣ major international honours. Only 1️⃣ @Cristiano 🐐

543
16,458
272
116,075
1,162,472
Stifler retweeted
🥹 We’ll miss these moments @Cristiano
100
3,409
38
25,316
142,959
you’ll never win anything anymore you filthy betrayers
Uma história que fica para sempre. 𝙊𝙗𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙖𝙙𝙤 𝙥𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙪𝙙𝙤, 𝘾𝙖𝙥𝙞𝙩𝙖̃𝙤 🐐⭐️
71
Cristiano Ronaldo’s Portugal story is one that will never be forgotten 🇵🇹👑
257
8,481
278
29,805
645,425
The one who inspired a generation 🇵🇹 Thank you Cristiano Ronaldo ♥️ @ManUtd
250
11,304
168
81,415
588,187
👏 @Cristiano. A true Premier League icon.
304
8,265
167
53,007
658,018