top dog
Toronto, Ontario
Joined July 2016
- Tweets49
- Following124
- Followers23
- Likes46
Michelle Goldstein retweeted
Jews once comprised 40 percent of Baghdad’s population. Now you can count the Jews left in the city on one hand.
This is what ethnic cleansing looks like.
Does anyone else constantly think of that 1 time on the 3rd day of gr. 9 in Mr. Kapustin’s Jewish History class where you had to read out loud in front of the class & you pronounced hemorrhaging as hemor-hanging & you felt shame deep in your soul for the next 22 years or just me?
Michelle Goldstein retweeted
I hate when RuPaul claps to stop Michelle talking. It’s so uncomfortable watching a man silence a woman like that.
I have a lot to say. Re: Britney and Craig Ferguson’s monologue circa 2008 #mentalhealthishealth ❤️ instagram.com/p/CLaEsNIgXBNR…
Michelle Goldstein retweeted
We restarted the Sopranos in my house except we call it “Crime Friends” and sit around trying to come up with new theme songs, like Hall & Oates’ Rich Girl:
“You’re a crime guy
And you got some pals
And you know you’re gonna do some crimes
You can rely on your old friend Paulie”
Michelle Goldstein retweeted
👏🏼👏🏼🥰🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼ok see you.......
#kimsconvenience
Michelle Goldstein retweeted
Breaking News: President Trump has suggested to aides in recent weeks that he wants to pardon himself, according to two people with knowledge of the discussions. nyti.ms/39d60z0
My kid watched home alone for the first time and I caught wind of him playing solo and exclaiming “if you don’t get your stupid ugly face off my property I’m going to shoot you in your penis off my security system.” Things are going well.
At least once a week my kid scream cries because he has bitten his own fingers while he’s eating. Is this a thing y/n/m #parentproblems
My kid dancing around this am to KC and the Sunshine Band’s Shake Your Booty in his undies SEEMED inappropriate until he used the groove to put ON his clothing for school and I realized I HAVE NEVER ENJOYED A PRIVATE DANCE THIS MUCH IN MY ENTIRE LIFE #CHIPPENDALE #rescueranger
My five year old, calling out to me from outside the bathroom: Mom, why do you have a book called the Ethical Slut
My husband, annoyed: Michelle, HE CAN READ Now
Me, to myself: l’m proud AF
Me to my kid: It’s called the Ethical Slot, & it’s about gambling
PROBLEM SOLVED #mom
Overheard at my house during bath time (while my 4 year old whines incessantly and refuses to condition his hair): “but I don’t want my hair to be silky and smooth!!!” #stoplookingatmeswan @AdamSandler
Today my kid stuck a paintbrush up his nose and told me he was getting covid tested. If that’s not some 2020 parenting shit, I don’t know what is #coronavirus #COVID19 #parenting #whatthefucktho