Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) header
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture

Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)

@ojedge

This is serious, mum.

 London/Waipu
Joined April 2011
  • Tweets30.5K
  • Following281
  • Followers8K
3.3KMedia
Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)Photo by Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge20 Mar 2015
Buy one Oprah, get Winfrey.
24
2,293
6
3,503
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
octopus/caveman (@octopuscaveman) profile picture
octopus/caveman@octopuscavemanApr 6
I posted “i am the first man in my bloodline to jack off in an Arby’s” on facebook and my uncle replied “not true.”
321
9,441
174
205,253
2,942,446
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge17 Jul 2016
Can't afford Apple iPhone Headphones? Hellmann's Squeezy Mayonnaise makes an excellent cheap alternative.
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
11
849
50
1,801
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge22 Dec 2017
reaching for the last Pringle in the can like
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
3
104
15
506
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge21 Nov 2017
I saw Daniel Day Lewis in my local supermarket today. He kept saying he was ‘an elderly woman’ and to ‘leave me alone’ but I knew it was him. Such a great actor.
7
309
16
1,066
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge22 Feb 2015
"Welcome to Exclamation Mark Overusers Anonymous!" 'Hello!! I'm Mark and I have a problem!!!!!!!" [whole group] "Hi Mark!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
22
824
3
1,362
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge4 Dec 2016
I lerved Herve Leger as the Jerker in Bertmern. RIP. Gern too sern.
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
43
1,834
111
4,125
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge5 Jul 2016
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
64
9,329
226
14,038
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge27 Jun 2016
I have a Polish friend who is a roadie for a band. I have a Czech one too. A Czech one too. Czech one too.
59
3,203
190
5,982
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
rob delaney (@robdelaney) profile picture
rob delaney
@robdelaney20 Jun 2014
Dildo I just found in my hotel's air vent tastes like lamb vindaloo.
290
1,857
233
8,883
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge22 Feb 2018
BOSS: why are you late? ME:
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
287
11,033
616
38,366
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge5 Oct 2022
help me obi-wan kenobi, you’re my only hope
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
6
38
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
ste(ph)en (@stephenjmolloy) profile picture
ste(ph)en
@stephenjmolloy27 Jan 2016
*air horn sound* *second air horn sound* Me: "This isn't deodorant."
159
20,501
306
41,044
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge19 Oct 2016
🎶 Whoa we're half way there, Whoa-oh…
Image from Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge)
12
302
33
551
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge1 Aug 2014
My colleague requested I play some Cure but I didn't have any so I played some Placebo instead, which seemed to work.
24
1,083
3
1,618
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge26 Feb 2017
I just spent 2 hours learning iMovie to make this.
70
805
119
1,826
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge15 Aug 2014
"Hey, Mr Tambourine Man, play a song for me." *shakes tambourine* "Got any others?" *shakes tambourine* "Sounds a lot like the last one"
73
6,010
31
11,162
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge17 May 2015
Lone Wolf: "I travel alone." Pack Wolf: "Safety in numbers." Steppenwolf: *gets motor runnin'* *heads out on highway*
14
949
1,610
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) (@ojedge) profile picture
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned)@ojedge9 Jan 2016
nothingcomparestothemarket(.)com - Sinead E'Commerce
1
5
7
Ollie Garch (Not Sanctioned) retweeted
sweatpants cher🔸 (@House_Feminist) profile picture
sweatpants cher🔸@House_Feminist13 Feb 2018
*hulk hogan voice* oh brother where art thou
6
606
8
1,908
Load more