I am a hologram
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Joined December 2017
- Tweets18.7K
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- Followers247
- Likes327K
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ME: okay so the metal gear solid franchise is very important and emotionally meaningful to me, but also a postmodern text that interrogates our assumptions abou-
GIRLFRIEND: why is that man doing fucked up somersaults and shooting bees at you
ME: sharon please don’t interrupt me
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whenever Doctor Who gets a new friend they always ask them where in time and space they want to go and the friend never has an answer. not me. off the dome - 1959, when the Harlem Globetrotters played Lenin Central Stadium in Moscow to an audience who did not grasp the premise
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opening the shell of the claymore to retrieve the delectable claymeats inside
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Remember, Halloween isn’t until tomorrow. If you go out tonight and see a vampire or skeleton, you shoot them with a gun.
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getting equipment to illegally start a radio station with a signal so strong it overpowers every other local radio purely so i can pretend to be the weather man
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Younger siblings tend to use claw attacks to inflict as much bleed damage as possible, playing the long game, ticking healthbars down, while elders try and use blunt attacks to pacify with overwhelming speed & force as to end the encounter as soon as possible
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You should only have three photographs of yourself max #ThomasPynchonMindset
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Chicago is great but its problems are obvious: it was built over soggy marshland and, to this day, ancient amphibians, pale salamanders the size of train cars and toads the size of houses, slumber in the soft mud beneath the water table. One day, those monsters will wake up.
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If you’re ever in a situation, the important thing is not to panic. Situations, while regrettable, happen every day.
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I would’ve been an actor but they don’t let you eat snacks during scenes unless your character’s eating snacks, and those roles are hard to get unless you know someone because everyone wants to eat snacks. I also would’ve been a musician but same deal during songs. Modeling, too.
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Garth from Wayne's World would;d have enjoyed being alive today. You can post that Bugs Bunny in drag is attractive to you on here and get thousands of likes. It's a shame he died in Iraq.
