piss/freak absurdist taken: malfoid
Hell
Joined September 2026
- Tweets785
- Following258
- Followers211
- Likes4.2K
HowlingDean retweeted
Im like puxatwaney Phil but instead of my shadow I become a whore after every dem win and a lover boy after ever R win
HowlingDean retweeted
I love gay election day because wdym you’re going as a sexy “I’m just a Bill” from schoolhouse rock
HowlingDean retweeted
I lay on my water bed filled with michelob ultra piss. Thirsty, I sip slowly from my straw port. ‘It was made with love’ I kid myself, crying softly, but I know that my mother poured naught but her malice into my place of rest. as I drift off into hate fueled nightmares, I weep.
HowlingDean retweeted
Just when I start to think I'm all out of ideas, the algorithm blesses me with some insane shit that old testament God would have melted a nigga for
HowlingDean retweeted
While you were chudding out, I was studying the blade.
While you were whacking off, I was studying the blade.
While you were fantasising about your sister, I was studying the blade.
While you were getting molested by your Phys. Ed. teacher? I was studying the blade.
While you were pounding a tall-boy before your shift at 8am? I WAS STUDYING THE BLADE.
HowlingDean retweeted
Got a “Namaste” from a woman at yoga and said “I’m Catholic” like I was producing ID at a checkpoint.
HowlingDean retweeted
HO! HO! HO! 🎅🎁✨ COCKTOBER 🎃 MIGHT BE OVER 👀👅 BUT NOW IT'S DICKMAS 🍆😏 TIME 🎄 JINGLE BALLS 🔔 JINGLE BALLS 🔔 CUMMIES 😫💦 ALL THE WAY
